f.r.i.e.n.d. (s)

an awkward raya for me. i mean those passed years i didn't go out to my friends' house because i didn't have any transport..but dis year, i mean dis particular year 2009, i have my own car and driving license but STILL have not went to any of my friends' house. too many reasons.
1: my wish to 'beraya' is not granted by dad.
2: ALL of my friends and that include me are too BUSY with our family.
3: still, permission not granted by daddy..

tsktsktsk

nvm, once i dh biasa drive, i'll go to ur house dearest friends...and we can go to PENANG!! as we planned.

n those who read dis blog (AS IF ADE ORG BCE)


tlg comment pic sy nih!

another emo entry

raya dah hampir tiba.
tibatiba kami seperti bergaduh kecil..
bukan apa.
saya agak berkecilhati dengan dia..
dia sangat sibuk..
bila saya tanya kenapa?
dia tak mahu beritahu sejujurnya kenapa.
susah sangat ke?
salah ke nak tahu kenapa?

saya sedih.
tapi saya tak punya tempat mahu mengadu
semalam saya sakit kepala.
minta dia temankan
tapi dia menolak
kerana dia sangat sibuk..
kadangkadang sibuk dengan perniagaan yang dia jalankan.
kadangkadang sibuk luangkan masa dengan temanteman dia.
hmm...
take good care of yourself my love..
be happy during raya..
forget me not..

saya mintak ampun mintak maaf
andai ada terkasar bahasa yang mengguris hati
harap halal makan minum barangbarang yang awak bagi.
saya sayang awak.
saya rindu awak.
saya perlu awak.

don't ask me why..

i feel like crying...

i don't know why...

don't ask me why...

i don't have the reason why...

all i know now,

i miss him...

we rarely sms each other..

we rarely spoke to each other...

he seems to be busy...

with business

with friends

with family

and

when i mentioned that he only have time for me during sahur,

he seems to be upset

but does he knows that deep inside i am bleeding?

i hate my life...

seriously i wanna go back to uia together with all my friends....

i miss them soo much...

dengan ini saya mengumumkan bahawasanya...

yeay....

selamat hari raya....

eh eh belum.....ampun.. *semangat berhari raya*

tahun nih seronok taw..*sile tnye kenapa?*

okeh.....sebenarnya...tahun ini kan..saye dan encik chenta hati akan berhari raya dengan baju yang sedondon..yeayyyyyy!! *sile senyum*

tapi...tapi....tapi kitorang jauh~ encik chenta hati kat batu pahat...saya kat kedah...*sile simpati* *terima kasih*

sile menongkat dagu dan bayangkan kami berpakaian sedondon kaler hijau...hehehehe *boleh la nk muntah tp nnti batal pose padan muka*

andai tibanya waktu..........................................

"kenapa awak cepat sangat sensitif skrg?"


satu soalan dari awak.

saya hampir menangis sesubuh pagi tadi.

bukan apa, cuma saya rasa awak masih belum kenal saya.

sedih.

awak sedar tak awak banyak berubah sekarang?

saya tak kisah awak sibuk.

saya cuma nak tahu sibuk dengan apa?

entah la awak.

orang lain fikir kita bahagia.

saya tak rasa macam tu sekarang.

saya rasa kehilangan awak yang pernah saya kenal dulu.

mungkin bagi awak ini perkara biasa.

pagi tadi, awak salahkan saya kenapa tak bertanya dulu,

sedar tak yang selama ini, kalau awak dengan rakan-rakan awak,
sangat susah untuk awak balas sms saya.

awak,
memang saya sensitif.
sebab saya rasa kita makin jauh.
saya dah tak rasa bahagia macam dulu.

maafkan saya kerana ada perasaan begini.
saya kecewa.

baby come back...

i miss him

he's been busy.
so busy lately.
these few days there are only one or two sms from him.
few phone calls.
T_______T

i don't know what is he up to lately.
when i asked him..
"busy wat ape?"
he told me
"ade la keje sket"
i asked
"keje ape?"
and he answers
"keje la..xkn nk gtaw awak sume ape saye buat."
*silent*

honestly, i'm hurt.
it feels like i am nothing to him so why should he told me everything.
i am not trying to control his life.
i am only wanted to know.
since then,
i never asked the same question.

and this morning,
i text him.
telling him what happen.
but he never replied.
T____T
sad.
i am not a crybaby.
but when it comes to things that involved life and death.
i think he should show some concern.

seriously, i feel like he doesn't care.

if you read this entry,
i only wish that you would show me that you care.
we rarely meet,
sms and phone calls are the only things that make us closer.
bukan niat nk control hidup awak.
cuma nak tahu.
jangan sampai bila orang tanya saya pasal awak
saya tade jawapan tu.
"berat sangat ke permintaan saya?"

T___________T


p/s:
I LOVE U.